[Here is a maybe-not-so-random sampling]
2. Perfect the fine art of corner-cutting by not really researching for a paper but instead writing your uneducated and unsubstantiated opinions and filling them in with strategically placed footnotes.
8. Practice misquoting and misrepresenting positions and ideas you don’t agree with. Be lazy and don’t attempt to understand opposing views; instead, nurse your prejudices and exalt your opinions by superficial reading and listening.
16. Don’t read to learn; read only to refute what you believe is wrong.
25. Spend more time blogging than studying.
26. Avoid chapel and other opportunities for corporate worship.
31. Master Calvin, Owen, and Edwards, but not the Law, Prophets, and Apostles.
32. Gain knowledge in order to merely teach others. Don’t expend the effort it takes to deal with your own heart.
40. Appear spiritual and knowledgeable at all costs. Don’t let others see your imperfections and ignorance, even if it means you have to lie.
41. Love books and theology and ministry more than the Lord Jesus Christ.
45. Don’t really try to learn the languages – let Bible Works do all the work for you.
[Guilty as charged on some of these counts ;-(.]
Read the whole list; there are a lot of other great ones.