If you don’t want to know, don’t ask

The ever irreverent Pastor Rev. Dr. Jim West has posted a very funny story. Since I know some of you won’t dare click on his site, I had to repost it here, because I don’t want you to miss it. (I hope he can forgive me.)

Lawyers should never have asked a Mississippi grandma a question if they weren’t prepared for her answer.

In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know me?’ She responded, ‘Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I’ve known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you’ve been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you’re a big shot when you haven’t the brains to realize you’ll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.’

The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, ‘Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?’

She again replied, ‘Why yes, I do. I’ve known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He’s lazy and he has a drinking problem. He can’t build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.’

The defense attorney nearly died.

The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, ‘If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I’ll send you both to the electric chair.’

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2 thoughts on “If you don’t want to know, don’t ask

  1. Jim says:

    You can nick whatever ya want from me Ben. But I really must ask- why would your readers be afraid of me? I’m precious!

    😉

  2. Ben says:

    Precious indeed!! But not everyone is as precious as you are 😉

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